A Better Digital Relationship

I’ve noticed during this past week, that I have more on my plate. We are  preparing for guests in our home, travels in the near future, turning 30 next month, and big shifts to Simply Bare,  I’ve been picking up my phone more. Instead of focusing that energy on completing the task, I am numbing. I am avoiding that to-do list, thinking unconsciously if I don’t do it, it might not stress me out. Yet in reality, by not facing it I am becoming more stressed. 

My time to complete a task is growing shorter, and the amount that it needs to be completed remains the same. So why do I keep looking the task in the eye, then putting my phone up between us?

Is it a means of wanting to protect myself? Is it a means of avoiding expanding? Is it the parts of me that fear change? That knowing if I show up differently, if I clear the clutter, the real me will be exposed? All the dust, debris, and mess will be cleared and I’ll finally have to shine? 

I believe it’s all of it. It’s the limiting beliefs that are keeping me small that are trapping me in this endless cycle of death scroll numbing. Yet, I can now see that, I see this part of me is scared and I’m worried about what will become, if I actually proceed forward without that part. 

Now, what do I do with this knowledge? In this moment I honor this part, I thank it. It is trying to protect me? What it doesn’t know is that present-day me has this, we are capable of doing hard things. This leads me to find a better relationship with these devices especially when times are more full. 

What that looks like is making my smartphone less smart, observing my thoughts, and setting timers to complete tasks. 

• De-smart the smartphone 

  • I’ll use the app on my phone, Freedom, that blocks the use of time-wasting apps. You can set it for a certain amount of time and your phone becomes just a phone and camera. This is exactly what I need because these devices are a hard habit to break 

• Observe my thoughts 

  • Checking in with myself when I want to pick up my phone. What am I avoiding, can I count 5-4-3-2-1… and then go start the task? Even for just ten minutes. I did just that for me to sit down and write this, and it flowed right out of me. 

• Setting Timers 

  • I find if I give myself a length of time that I have to 100% show up, it helps me stay on task. The shorter the timer the more focused I am. I love the Pomodoro method for this. 25 minutes on 5 minutes off and you do that for 4 rounds before taking a half hour break. 

Changing our relationship to addictive vices is no easy feat. Yet, finding the awareness that you do have an ill relationship is a huge step to making a shift. Today, I see the problem, but I also I see solutions now. At this moment I must implement the changes so that I can shine. So that I can take back the power of my time. 

How do you find your relationship with technology to be? What helps you break the cycle when you are numbing? Let me know below!